


The Body Milk Incident

by FrizzleNox



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Body Milk, Bottom Patrick Brewer, Dialogue-Only, M/M, Patrick Brewer is Thirsty, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rose Apothecary (Schitt's Creek), Smut, Top David Rose, Workplace Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:41:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26077378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrizzleNox/pseuds/FrizzleNox
Summary: “Fuck.”“What David?”“Why are you naked?”Patrick has a mishap involving Body Milk. David helps Patrick take advantage of the situation.Smut.Dialogue only.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 2
Kudos: 56





	The Body Milk Incident

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tailor1971](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tailor1971/gifts).



> Thanks to my Rose Apothecary friends for helping me answer some business questions. 
> 
> I wanted to take a shot at dialogue only smut. This is the result.

“Patrick.”

“What?”

“Take off your pants.”

“Not here, at the store.”

“Fine, stay all... milky.”

“This is uncomfortable.”

“So, take off your pants.”

“David, not when we could have a customer walk in any moment.”

“We could close early.”

“No, let’s wait, it’s only 10 minutes.”

“Okay.”   


“I’m hiding behind the counter.”

“You look fine, Patrick.”

“I look like a teenager who jizzed in his pants.”

“Maybe you did.”

“David, stop it.”

“I’ve made you do it before.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“It’s natural.”

“It’s a good thing that I like you, David.”

“Yeah, it would be really awkward if you didn’t.”

“Stop with that look.”

“What?”

“That... look. Like you’re up to something.”

“Why?”

“Because it does things to me, and you know it.”

“Nope. I don’t know anything.”

“Well, thanks to that nice bit of eye-fucking, I’m going to hide in the backroom before my pants get even messier.”

“You’re such a naughty boy, Mr. Brewer.”

“Come join me when the store is closed.”

“So I can close early?”

“Eight minutes, David.”

“Fine.”

“Eight minutes and then you can lock the door, turn the sign, and bring me the Z Report from the register.”

“I can’t wait.”

“Good.”

“You know, I never thought you’d be this… Um…”

“This what?”

“This easy.”

“You do things to me, David.”

“Good things?”

“Very good things.”

“Why is the water running?”

“I’m cleaning my pants. Five minutes.”

“There’s no one....”

“Flip that sign back to open, David.”

“Patrick…”

“Four minutes.”

“But…”

“You’re so impatient.”

“You’re so strict.”

“Oh, is that the door?”

“Hello Twyla… no… you don’t have to come back tomorrow… take your time.”

“I told you, David.”

“Patrick, Twyla says hi.”

“I’d come out to greet her but you know…”

“She says it’s fine.”

“You can close up when she leaves.”

“Thank you for your purchase Twyla.... I’m not sure what Patrick was thinking for dinner... If not tonight, we’ll see you for pastries in the morning…”

“Good job, David.”

“I made a sale.”

“You can close up now.”

“Thank you, Patrick.”

“It’s my favorite time of the day.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because every day you turn the sign to closed and give me a kiss.”

“I’m becoming predictable.”

“I like it, David.”

“Your report is printing.”

“I’m ready for it. Can you sweep and restock so I can run paperwork?”

“Sure.”

“My pants are in the dryer.”

“Fuck.”

“What David?”

“Why are you naked, in the store?”

“You told me to go to the back room and take off my pants.”

“Pants, not underwear, or shirt.”

“I didn’t wear underwear today, and there was body milk on my shirt.”

“That’s unlike you.”

“I need to do laundry. Happens some times.”

“I’m glad I didn’t know about this earlier.”

“Oh, why’s that?”

“You know how much I like your hockey thighs.”

“Is this better?”

“You’re such a tease.”

“I’ll pay for the tote bag.”

“Our customers don’t need to get some dried jizz with their products.”

“I know.”

“I think I’ve got a new kink?”

“Oh?”

“Seeing you sitting here naked working on spreadsheets is making my pants a little tight.”

“I’m shocked.”

“Who thought that spreadsheets would be a turn on?”

“I can’t believe I’m making tax code sexy.”

“You make mid-range denim sexy.”

“And I’ll put it back on as soon as it’s dry.”

“You really don’t have to.”

“I’m not going streaking David.”

“Good, because I don’t think that the rest of this town needs to see your perfect ass.”

“Stop.”

“What?”

“You’re gonna make me cum all over our office.”

“Like you haven’t had an orgasm in here before.”

“That was before we got privacy.”

“Yeah, but it was so fucking hot. Giving you a hickey and making you moan.”

“You’re the worst.”

“Am I?”

“Yeah.”

“Either you’ve smuggled an eggplant in that totebag or your penis is saying something different.”

“Last time we said we wouldn’t do this in here again.”

“Yeah, but at that time I didn’t think I’d ever come in here to see you naked.”

“I need to remember to keep a change of clothes here.”

“I’m glad it was a slow day today; not much work to do.”

“Yeah, I’ll just get back to my spreadsheets.”

“I’ve got a better idea.”

“And what would that be?”

“You really want to know?”

“Oh my gosh, David.”

“Do you like it?”

“Mmm. S’nice.”

“Where do you want my hands.”

“Wherever you want them.”

“You sure?”

“David, You’re such a fucking tease.”

“You love it.”

“Is this better?”

“You bent over the desk. Of course. I got off to the thought of this once or twice.”

“I thought you’d like it.”

“I love your perfect ass, your thick thighs, that cock.”

“Keep going.”

“Your pale skin, your back muscles. The little freckles on your shoulders.”

“You’re such a tease.”

“Mmm. You know you love it.”

“I love your tongue…”

“So that’s what you wanted?”

“Ugh… Fuck... David… You know how much I love this… Don’t stop… Please....”

“I wanna fuck you so bad.”

“David you… Fuck… I want that gorgeous penis inside of me. I bet you’re so hard right now.”

“Damnit. I, do you have….”

“Here…”

“Holy fuck Patrick… Really, in the desk drawer?”

“I thought we might need them someday.”

“You are fucking perfect.”

“Cock... I want… my ass… Now…”

“I love it when you beg…”

“David… yes…so good...”

“You’re so tight.”

“I feel so full.”

“Ready?”

“Stop teasing me.”

“You love it… Oh…”

“Yes… faster…”

“Like this?’

“Yes… Touch me…”

“I’m so close.”

“I am too.”

“Just fuck….”

“David….”

“I’ve got you, Patrick.”

“Yes… Fuck… David…”

“Patrick… So… Yes.... Yes… So...Fuck…”

“Wait…”

“What?”

“I want to feel you for a minute longer.”

“Okay.”

“Thank you.”

“Mmm. This was your idea. Thank you.”

“Was it?....

“So much better…”

“That tote bag is destroyed.”

“I kind of like it covered in your cum.”

“David!”

“What? You came all over my name. That’s kind of hot.”

“My clothes are dry.”

“Ugh, fine.”

“We should um… do this again?”

“Yes, please.”

“Next time I wanna fuck you over the desk.”

“You fucking tease.”

“What?”

“Here.”

“Thanks, David.”

“You did wear underwear today.”

“Should I not have…?

“No, it was much better that you washed them too…”

“So I should do my spreadsheets naked again?”

“I wouldn’t be opposed to it.”

“Go restock the store, David Rose.”

“Will do, Patrick Brewer.

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to visit me on [tumblr](http://frizzlenox.tumblr.com).


End file.
